The carpet matches the drapes

I need some good blogs to read. Suggest some to me if you know of any I might like.

It doesn't matter how much you love your job, Mondays suck donkey balls. There's nothing fun about getting your ass out of bed and staring down the beginning of another 5 straight days of work. I didn't want to get up this morning. It took every ounce of effort I could muster to even roll over and shut off the alarm clock.

After the break up The EX stayed in the house and I moved into a nice apartment complex. He offered me the house but I think there's something very covert lez about a single woman living in a suburban subdivision alone. To me that screams "I'm a dyke and will most likely be adopting some kinds from Kenya soon to soothe the sting of lonliness." What does a single person need with 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, and a finished basement?

So my apartment complex is very nice. It's expensive. So much so that I might need to start giving handjobs at red traffic lights to make rent money. You'd think in such a nice place there would be an abundance of yuppie business men and young families. No, no, no. I have the weirdest hodge podge of God's forgotten children in my building. Maybe they put me in the retard's wing to keep me away from the real people? My across the hall neighbor is an old bag who constantly has a cigarette in her mouth, old, ratty slippers on and no bra. She's got to be pushing 70 and she dyes her hair construction cone orange. She likes the black dick and surprisingly gets it on a regular basis. She gets piss drunk at least once a month and knocks at my door at ridiculous hours slurring her words and asking me for something random, like pepper. The conversation always ends in her telling me something disgusting inappropriate. Like "I dye my pubes red (side note: it's not red. Seriously, it's orange.) too. Men don't care if you have a bush as long as its the same color as the hair on your head." Thank you for the mental image of you spreading hair dye on your 1970's style porno bush. This morning, while I was leaving for work, I saw her outside walking her rat of a dog. She was sucking on a cigarette like it was giving her money and shuffling along in those slipper that were probably pink at one time. She barked "Hey honey, you have any ricotta cheese?"