I twisted my ankle last night. And not even in a cool way. It wasn't like I was stumbling out of a cool bar at 2am, stepped on a diamond as big as my fist, fell down a flight on stairs and landed head first into Patrick Dempsey's lap. No, I just tripped up the stairs in my apartment building at 11:30 after doing not a god damn thing all fucking night long. I did however scream "God tits!" Really loud. Don't know why. Was the first thing that popped into my head. Some dude down the hall opened his door and was nice enough to just shut the door and keep what I'm sure would be retarded comments to himself.
Now I'm hobbling around. I will attract a whole new breed of men. Guys who like to sport fuck cripples.
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6 comments:
I'm going to assume you feel gracefully
Sport fucking cripples?
Best. Olympic Event. Ever.
Janel- I'm going to assume you meant "fell" and because I like you I will allow you to get away with that.
Moog- I expect to see you at next year's events
Guys who like to fuck sportin' cripples? Hey, I could get into that.
I was in that event in the 2004 olympics...lost to the German paraplegic team...fuckers...
Organic, those German's always take it. You need a little more conditioning. Come by my place. I know a rehab facility that is FULL of opportunity
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